Talk to parent

Why should I do it:

Establishes and builds trust and rapport with parents and home
Increases parent and home cooperation
Provides increased support for students at home
Helps dispel misinformation and mistruth students may give to parents
Avoids students positioning parents against teachers
Helps to get everyone on the same page
Helps to get parents involved and increases buy-in
Helps provide parents with accountability
Can diffuse angry parents’ concerns
 

When should I do it:

When students are struggling with behavior or academics
When students are doing well to help encourage them and their parents
When you hold behavior meetings
When students say they are doing something but clearly are not
When students are obviously lying
When students’ behavior or affect (emotions) change
When students say there is trouble in the home, like a death, illness, parent frequently not home, etc
When students appear messy and disheveled
When there appears to be little to no home support or follow through
When a parent is angry or negative toward the teacher, staff, or school
When students are sent to the office
When students receive rewards and praise in school
 

How do I do it:

Teachers and staff should talk to parents for both negative and positive reasons, like a student exhibiting good behavior or a student being sent to the office for poor behavior
When speaking to parents in person or over the phone, use a calm, neutral, and non-threatening tone
Make a list of key points to discuss before speaking to parents and try to stick to them
Always start conversations with parents saying positive things about their child and the parent
Use professional and appropriate language
Be sensitive and considerate
Be very aware of your body language and try to keep it neutral, for example, don’t cringe at a parent with poor hygiene or role your eyes when a parent is clearly lying
Know when to end a discussion with a parent, for example, when a parent begins to raise their voices, starts to become excessively animated, threatens, uses inappropriate language in an angry or threatening manner, stands up while speaking in an angry or threatening manner, will not listen to the teacher, become obstinate and belligerent, etc
Stop a discussion with a parent when you feel you are starting to become too angry, frustrated, agitated, etc to remain professional and appropriate
Don’t assume parents can read or fully understand papers, notes, their children’s’ home work, etc, rather, always offer to read letters, papers, etc for parents and always ask if parents understand what you are saying or reading, offering to re-explain it
Speak in plain language and avoid wordy or difficult to understand language
Set expectations, limits, and rules for discussion when you feel they have a high likelihood of becoming long, drawn out, hostile, tense, contentious, etc
Be thoughtful and considerate about when to include a student in a discussion with parents
Make sure you have a clear-cut goal or end to the discussion and make this clear to the parent early on
Provide parents with examples of whatever you are talking about with them regarding the student, like work samples, pictures, behavior logs and data tracking, etc
Speak with colleagues for advice, input, etc on parents they may have also dealt with and ask them to sit in on a parent conversation if needed
Document all parent meetings, talks, and contacts with a date, time, and a summary of the interaction
When necessary, like with hostile, difficult, angry parents, have an administrator join the parent contact